CLA method

Many parents wonder how they can help their baby or toddler develop healthy sleep habits. And how do babies and children learn to fall asleep and stay asleep as gently as possible?

One very effective approach is the CLA method („Cry in Loving Arms“).

The CLA method is not a traditional sleep training method in the strict sense. However, it can be highly effective in promoting better sleep and longer sleep stretches. The name and implementation of this method are my personal adaptation of attachment-based and developmental psychology approaches to improving sleep issues in babies and toddlers.

CLA as a Sleep Learning Method

The „Cry in Loving Arms“ method is one of the most attachment-oriented sleep-learning methods available.

It is based on the work of developmental psychologist Dr. Aletha J. Solter, founder of the Aware Parenting movement, which is closely related to the Attachment Parenting philosophy.

In essence, CLA means that you stop exhausting and nerve-wracking distraction and soothing maneuvers for sleep altogether. Instead, you hold your child calmly in your arms, allowing them to express their emotions through tears and release any pent-up distress. This often leads to improved sleep and longer sleep cycles.

Dr. Aletha Solter has written extensively on the „crying-in-arms approach.“ Her work provides valuable insights into why allowing a baby to cry in the loving presence of a parent is both developmentally appropriate and psychologically beneficial.

Developmental Psychology Insights

Why babies cry

To understand how the crying-in-arms approach works, it is necessary to understand why babies cry. Crying has two important functions: communication and healing. Everybody knows that babies cry to communicate basic needs such as hunger, coldness, or the need to be held. But the healing function of crying is not as widely understood. Babies sometimes cry in order to heal from stress or trauma, even when all of their immediate needs have been met.

Studies have shown that babies in all cultures cry for no apparent reason, and that this crying typically peaks at six weeks of age. The term „colic“ is used when the crying seems excessive, but studies have shown that the majority of „colicky“ babies have nothing wrong with their digestion. This crying often represents an emotional healing process. Evidence comes from studies showing that babies who had a traumatic birth or whose mothers suffered from high levels of stress during pregnancy cry more than those who did not experience these stresses.

Many babies continue to have crying spells well past the typical period of „three-months’ colic.“ They may cry following over-stimulation or out of frustration before developmental milestones such as crawling or walking. Crying also increases when there is stress in the home. Even with the best of parenting, babies experience numerous hurts, frights, and frustrations, and these can all result in a need to cry. When babies reach the toddler stage, their desire for autonomy sometimes results in frustration and tantrums. Temperament also plays a role. Highly sensitive babies cry more than those who are less sensitive.

This stress-release crying represents a normal and beneficial healing process, and we do babies a disservice when we try to stop it. When babies are left to cry alone, they feel terrified, and their cortisol levels increase. However, there is no research indicating that crying in a parent’s loving arms increases a baby’s stress hormone levels or harms healthy babies in any way (assuming all immediate needs have been met). In fact, studies have shown that stress hormones are excreted in tears, and that people have a lower pulse rate, lower blood pressure, and more synchronized brain wave patterns after a good cry.

Source: http://www.awareparenting.com/cryinginarms.htm

According to Dr. Solter, there are many reasons why a baby cries. She believes that a baby older than six months who wakes up multiple times at night may be trying to „catch up“ on stress-release crying or seeking emotional healing.

In this sense, the CLA method focuses on not interrupting these crying and healing attempts and not immediately trying to get the baby back to sleep. It also avoids automatically offering the breast, pacifier, bottle, or rocking as a solution and distraction. Instead, the baby is calmly held in loving arms, accompanied by understanding words, and allowed to release their tears, frustration, or accumulated stress.

Personal Experiences

Especially in babies who tend to cry a lot or have experienced difficult births or pregnancies, it is remarkable to observe how they reach a new level of relaxation, satisfaction, and improved sleep through CLA. However, I also see excellent results in other babies. CLA is probably my personal favorite method for helping young babies sleep—both with my own children and in my work as a sleep consultant.

These days, it is often said that nursing or sucking is the right response to every kind of restlessness. As a result, I frequently hear mothers say they feel like their breast has become a „pacifier,“ even when the baby is not hungry and their back already aches from constant night nursing. This is where CLA comes in, offering a loving, deeply connected, and attachment-based approach that often brings relief for the entire family.

For more information and insights on how to improve your baby’s sleep, don’t miss my free email course. Here, you will also learn how we improved my six-month-old daughter’s sleep using the CLA method.